Z is for Zingers

The letter "Z" means it is the end of the A to Z Challenge. Hope you've enjoyed the ride.

When speaking, "Always leave 'em laughing!" is a good motto. I thought it also would be a good way to wind up our month of A to Z Challenge.

My warped sense of humor and my curmudgeon reputation means that I like zingers, those often insulting throw-away one liners. Enjoy these (or not).

• He says he has a mind of his own. He's welcome to it-- who else would want it?
  
• He has a one-track mind, and the traffic on it is very light.
  
• He paid $500 to have his family tree searched, and found out he was the sap.
  
• His neck reminds you of a typewriter -- Underwood.
  
• A traffic judge asked him, "Have you ever been up before me?" And he said, "I don't know, what time do you get up?"
  
• He called it quits when his fourth child was born, because he read that every fifth child born is Chinese!
  
• He's so dumb, he thinks the St. Louis Cardinals are appointed by the Pope.
  
• He jumped off the bus backwards when he heard someone say, "Let's grab his seat when he gets off."
  
• He believes in a balanced diet -- a beer in each hand.
  
• In Las Vegas, he even loses money on the stamp machines.
  
• He saved for years to buy an unbreakable, waterproof, shockproof watch - and lost it.
  
• He always takes his salary to the bank. It's too small to go by itself.
  

Oh, my ears! I can hear the groans from here, despite being hearing impaired.

Luckily, this is ZZZZeee end of the A to Z for this year.